THERAPY FOR YOUR LOVED ONE - AND YOURSELF by Anna Penido

It is a huge endeavor to hustle after the services of a broken mental health

system. Even if you went through the NAMI family-to-family course, even if you

joined a family-support group, believe me, you need way more than that to keep

your sanity. Women and especially mothers, tend to take care of everyone else

first, and in the specific case we are in, as mothers of people with mental health

conditions, the demands never end. Therapy is not a luxury. It’s a survival

necessity. I have been on therapy for 6 years now. Before you say I can’t afford it

be aware that there are a lot of possibilities from sliding scale to university

students. At Antioch University in Los Angeles, there is a clinic where students can

practice. Last year Psychology students provide services in exchange of credits.

Generally, from 4 -6 months. When one leaves you request to continue with

another one. Whoever was the last person giving sessions to you will recommend

someone they know. The very first student therapist I had was a post-grad

student. After he finished school and opened his private office, he offered for me

to continue with him on a donation basis. It was a generous action no doubt, but

I also suspect that he was benefitting from a second education directly from me,

learning firsthand details about the system and the devastating challenges that

serious mental illness inflicts in a family – an in-depth education that no university

can provide. If your town does not have a low-cost university clinic and you

depend on Medi-Cal, another option is to consult a psychiatrist stating you feel

anxiety or depression, and request for a therapist referral. That’s the only way

insurance will allow you to get a therapist. Just remember you are not obliged to

take the pharmaceuticals prescribed if you don’t feel it is necessary. We all feel

anxious and sad, this is normal under the circumstances we face daily, but most of

the times the support from therapy alone together with nutrition, exercise and

supplements will give us enough balance to handle these emotions without

pharmaceuticals. I consider my once-a-week 50 min therapy a sacred time

because it allows me to express my frustration with the system, my anger about

the neglect from staff and institutions, my sadness for my son’s losses, my guilt

for not having solved my son’s request for a place to live and so much more. It is

the time that I breathe, I organize my thoughts, I strategize my next actions, the

time I become vulnerable and cry. There is someone listening with full attention. I

feel cared for and not alone. If you still doubt on the usefulness of therapy let me

tell you something that might convince you: while doing therapy I was able to

experiment in myself a bunch of different modalities of therapy, which helped me

understand what is generally offered also for people with mental illness like CBT

(Cognitive Behavior Therapy) and DBT ( Dialectical Behavior Therapy). So I learned

they are not helpful especially for those who are still suffering from delusions

despite taking medication, those with thought disorder, cognitive challenges,

short attention span and lack of motivation. “Understanding the behavior” will

not help a person with schizophrenia change the behavior even if he wants to.

People with schizophrenia improve with Applied Behavior Therapy, Music

Therapy, Art Therapy, a LEAP- trained professional (therapist or staff) and a

compassionate psychologist with experience in schizophrenia, who will not try to

“remove” the delusion or make the person feel “wrong”, but who will side with

him to create trust, who will become a friend, and who will be there every week,

to listen, to welcome, to provide a safe space, like an anchor in the tempest.

That’s what we offer in the Whole Mind Symphony program.

Therapy Resources:

Antioch University Clinic - https://www.antioch.edu/centers-institutes/aus-

counseling-center/

Airport Marina Counseling (sliding scale) - https://www.amcshelps.com

Open Counseling lists free and low-cost services:

https://www.opencounseling.com/california/los-angeles